Twists and Turns
by Katarinea
Summary: Tiny decisions affect the flow of time and the course of events. There are many worlds where Penny is not the one who dies. . .AU oneshots. Rated for death.
1. In which Dr Horrible saves a life

The van careened off the road, the beacon on its top utterly destroyed. He knew there was close to little hope of the remote stopping it, but he tried anyway – until he saw the huge van heading for a too-familiar tiny redhead. Then he ran from where he stood, throwing away his remote and almost running into the wall.

He made it there just in time, pushed her out of the way and _good, _she was safe-

Then the van hit him, and his only thought was _wow, this hurts really bad. _A moment later, he felt the hot metal that was crushed around his stomach peel away, one long piece of the fender withdrawing from between his ribs and causing him to scream, high and loud. Looking up, he saw two familiar fuzzy outlines bent over him, one broad-shouldered and brown-haired, and the other slight and graceful, beautiful even though he couldn't see her.

Things got darker, and he only vaguely heard the Corporate Tool say, "Citizen! Your junior heroics aren't bad, but leave it to me – _I'm_ the one with the saving expertise!"

_~the Sing-a-long Blog~_

Penny nervously nibbled her lip as she sat in the chairs outside the emergency operating room. She had been out, looking for signatures, when suddenly a van had come flying down the road towards her. . .without a driver. She had braced for impact, but the impact that came was not what she expected. A warm, hard body had slammed into hers, and she had flown into a huge pile of garbage bags (conveniently placed, her mind mumbled). Then she had heard a _crunch_, followed by a woosh.

She had opened her eyes and stood up just as Captain Hammer (!) peeled the van off her savior. . .and her heart had broken a bit when she recognized the eccentric boy from the Laundromat that had signed her petition. Then she heard him scream, and her heart ached for him. Penny was grateful for his intervention, but surely she wasn't worth such pain. . .

The operating room door opened and the surgeon (his name was Elias Likser, but he went by E. Likser; he liked to help her sometimes) exited the room, gloves and gown covered in blood that was so much more red than her hair. She jumped up and hurried over to him, anxious to know. . . "How is he?"

The youthful doctor sighed and looked up at the ceiling before looking back at her. "He's stable for the moment, but chances aren't good that he'll survive, even now. It's a miracle he survived the impact." Another sigh. "He's unconscious, but. . .if you want to say your goodbyes, he'll be in a private room shortly." She nodded and made for the desk to ask where he was being placed, but Dr. E. Likser placed a hand on her arm. "Before you go, I have a question or two for you. Are you good friends with this young man?"

She bit her lip and thought for a moment before answering. "Uhm. . .we do laundry together twice a week, and he signed my petition. . ."

"Good enough. Have you ever noticed him limping, wincing, bruised, generally injured or in pain?"

"A couple times. Sometimes I saw some really bad bruises on his neck. . ." Penny trailed off, thinking about the months since she had first seen him at the Laundromat. He did come in with cuts on his hands and face, lots of bruises, and he did limp a lot. "Why?"

Elias sighed and covered his face with his hand. "I was afraid so. While operating, I discovered many signs of past, improperly treated trauma and injuries. This may point to abuse in his past. Whether it is currently ongoing or happened while he was younger, the nature of some of these injuries are. . .horrible."

_~the Sing-a-long Blog~_

Penny closed the door quietly behind her and stepped a little further into the room. On the bed lay the man who had saved her life, pale and wrapped in pink-and-red tinted bandages. She sidled close to the bed and stood awkwardly for a moment before sitting down in the bedside chair and covering his limp hand with hers. His fingers were chilly and cold, and she knew exactly why – blood loss tended to do that.

"Er, uhm, hi Billy. T-thank you for. . . saving me, and signing my petition. I guess laundry brings people together. Or something. I really don't know how to thank you enough for endangering yourself. . . I really hope you don't die." Penny lapsed into silence once more before she picked up the cool hand and hugged it. "Thanks." Then she sat there, quiet, his hand laying in her lap as she vigorously rubbed it, trying to warm it.

Then the door flew open, banging against the wall, Captain Hammer standing there in a heroic pose as the doorknob molested the wall. "Stand back, pretty citizen! Dr. Horrible shall not harm you – I am here to arrest him and make him pay for his horribleness!"

Penny gaped at him. "What? This is. . .Billy, not _Dr. Horrible._"

"It is the one and evil Dr. Horrible! Stand back!" The bulky man moved toward the bed and reached toward the IV line that was giving the injured man valuable blood and fluids. Penny sprung from her seat faster than she thought she could act, and slapped the ridiculously huge bicep that was stretching across the bed. Then she wrenched open the bedside drawer and pulled out exactly what she knew would be there – a huge Gideon Bible that she then immediately used to hit Hammer's. . .hammer-hand.

"Get out! You're in the sickroom of an innocent, heroic man! _Get out!"_ Penny screamed, drawing the attention of E. Lixer and a passing nurse, who bolted into the room.

"Captain Hammer! Please remove yourself from the sickroom, immediately!" The doctor shouted, running across the room to stop the hero from removing the IV. . .but he was too slow. Even with Penny beating at him, Hammer managed to pull out the IV from Billy's arm with a sickening rip. The needles dropped and hit the floor with a sickening tinkle, and then E. Lixer stabbed another needle into Hammer's skin. The erstwhile superhero staggered and his eyes drooped before he hit the floor, sound asleep. Everyone there breathed a sigh of relief, but not for long. The heart monitor let out a screeching alarm – Billy's heartrate was dropping dangerously low. E. Lixer and the nurse scrambled around the room, frantically replacing the fallen needles, replacing the IV, and doing all they could to stabilize the frail young man.

As Penny stared at the line on the heart monitor, she muttered under her breath, _"Balls."_

_~the Sing-a-long Blog~_

**CAPTAIN HAMMER: HERO OR VILLIAN?**

_Yesterday, in a tragic series of events, a young man saved a woman from a van gone wild. After surgery and much to-do, the young man was stable and doctors were hopeful until Captain Hammer burst into the private room that the man had been provided with. The superhero began to yell about how the injured hero was "Dr. Horrible", and then he proceeded to murder an innocent. Billy Buddy died after three hours in the intensive care unit. Whether or not Captain Hammer will be taken to trial for murder is yet unknown, but he has been put on suspension from the Heroes' Guild indefinitely._


	2. In which Penny acts oddly

Penny sighed and put her head in her hands. Captain Hammer was not a bad man, just. . .stupid. And needlessly cruel. Countless time she had watched him beat, maim, and injure Dr. Horrible when the villain was clearly already beaten. She was grateful, very much so, for what he had done for her in helping her open the homeless shelter; but gratefulness could only go so far. The grand opening was in two weeks, and he clearly expected _something_ in exchange for what he had done for her. Penny rolled her eyes, all the jokes about "the Hammer" flowing through her head. She didn't think she'd ever heard so many innuendoes before in such a short time. Kind, gentle, and caring were all words she would use to describe herself, and dumb was not something she would call herself. She could tell he wanted sex.

But she didn't. She wanted to wait until that perfect moment on her wedding night, when her husband would smile at her, blue eyes gentle and loving, and murmur sweet nothings – "Hi, Penny!" A passing homeless girl grinned at her, familiar gold hair bouncing around her face, and her greeting snapped Penny out of her reverie. They talked for a little bit, and then Captain Hammer strode in and looked around for her, spotting her and walking over.

"Hello, pretty redhead." He grinned what many would call a winning smile, but all she could see was sleaze in his eyes. "Hello, young child." He turned the smile upon the young girl and it became a grimace. Then he turned back to her and the smile became easier. "How about we go out for a night on the town, gorgeous?" The Captain winked, and it was comical, mostly because he had to work at not shutting both eyes.

"I'm. . .well, I suppose, but -" he cut her off before she could finish most of her sentence.

"That's great! I know a place that fixes steaks as thick as the Hammer, and almost as tasty!" Another wink, followed by a leer. She shivered and stood, speaking as she hugged Eliza goodbye.

"I'm vegetarian, remember?" Penny mussed the golden curls of the small girl and waved goodbye to the blind man serving soup. What an odd moustache. . .

"Right, that means you don't like vegetables. Neither do I!" He beamed at her.

_~the Sing-a-long Blog~_

She picked at the steak sitting on her plate, and all she could see was the huge brown eyes of the cow that had been murdered for this. What cruelty, what barbarism . . . she glanced across the table at Captain Hammer (why didn't she know his name?) and saw that he was on his seventh steak. On the house, of course. She had managed to eat the vegetables that came with the steak, but now she was faced with the dilemma of what to do with this poor murdered animal. "Hey, are you gonna eat that?" Captain Hammer asked, his mouth full of death. She looked down at her plate and opened her mouth to speak. Then she closed it. And opened it again.

"No. No, I'm not." She pushed her chair away from the table and stood up. "I'm _vegetarian,_ which means I only eat vegetables, not that I **don't** eat them. You're eating murder, and you're haven't looked at my face once since you saw me today. I'm disappointed in you – at first I thought you were cheesy, and then I thought you were sweet, and now. . .now, you're just sleazy. I . . ." She gulped. She'd never broken up with anyone before. "I don't want to be your girlfriend. You're uncaring, you're arrogant, and. . .you're mean. Goodbye."

Then Penny turned and marched out of the quaint little restaurant, and thirteen people uploaded videos to YouTube.

_~the Sing-a-long Blog~_

**CAPTAIN HEARTBROKEN: MISUNDERSTANDING OR MISS DEMANDING?**

_In a fiasco last night, Captain Hammer's girlfriend broke up with him. She called him bad names and told him she was a vegetarian, something the Captain claims she never told him. A fan of the Hammer that was in the restaurant tells us that "she was very angry, very demanding, he asked if she enjoyed her food and she blew up at him. I'd never treat the one and only Captain Hammer like that." The ex-girlfriend also claimed that he sexually objectified her, to which the Captain responds that he does not know what "objectified" means. Is this just a bump on the course to true love? Or is this for good?_

Billy read the paper with amazement and a huge grin. At the end, he laughed and shot his fist into the air. "Yes! Take that, Corporate Tool! Way to go, Penny!"

_~the Sing-a-long Blog~_

Penny sat on the washer, idly swinging her legs and staring into her frozen yogurt. She had just come in and was waiting for Billy before she started her laundry. A pretty dark green bra lay on top of her clothes today, and she wanted to see how red Billy would turn when he saw it. Then the door 'ding'ed, and she turned, a smile blossoming across her face as she saw the slight, tall boy. "Hi Billy-buddy."

"H-hi, P-penny." He stuttered, wincing at how silly he sounded. "How are you?"

"Better than ever." She grinned at him and jumped off the machine, grabbing her basket and setting it atop the washer. It only took him a few seconds to notice what sat at the top, and he turned a red to rival her hair, blue eyes huge and round. After he recovered, they went about their laundry and eventually wound up sitting on top of the washers again, eating their yogurt.

"So, I, uh, heard you broke up with cheesy-on-the-outside. . ." Billy trailed off, not certain where to go from there.

"Mmmhm." She hummed as she spooned strawberry frozen yogurt into her mouth. "He was a pie. You were right." Penny shook her spoon at him laughingly. "I'll listen better next – oops!" The spoon fell out of her hand and onto the floor, so she slid down once more to grab it. . .and noticed the washer across from them held a plethora of brown t-shirts with a hammer symbol in the middle. She blinked and stared. . .and then tugged the washer door open and dumped the remainder of her frozen yogurt inside. Once she closed the door, it went back to spin cycle, and she cackled maniacally. Billy stared, eyes wide with wonder at what had just happened, as she clambered back onto her washer and smiled again. "Where were we. . .?"


End file.
